Joy Equation: The Future (Prompt 2)

I imagine what my life will look like in a few days, months or years. I wonder about major life events, such as children or moving, or the little things, like what I am going to wear at work tomorrow. I’m very future-focused, so this is an interesting prompt.

I always thought moving out of Florida was a big to-do on my list of “stuff to do in the future” as well as going back to school. There are some non-negotiable items, like having children, that remain my list.

Now that I am taking some time to really envision my future, I’m picturing a different scenario. Instead of specifics, like going back to school to be a [insert occupation here], I simply want a job that makes me feel like I’m contributing something to my community. As a social worker, that isn’t a stretch and I can probably apply my skills and education to a variety of careers without continuing my education. It’s a little easier to list my requirements for a joyful, fulfilling future, so here it goes:

1. A happy, healthy marriage. I know it should go without saying. Of course, everyone wants their relationships to be happy and healthy. No one wants to be miserable when they are with their partners, families and friends. I am terrified of failing at my marriage. My parents divorced when I was very little. On one hand, I was always grateful that my parents spared me from years of misery and unhappiness. Neither of my parents should feel obligated to stay in an unhappy home. I think that can be just as damaging as divorce to be honest. However, I am always fearful that this predisposes me to my own divorce or that it is somehow the only alternative to unhappiness. This has been a very challenging first year for my husband and I. I hope it helps us grow as a family rather than tear us apart.
2. Discovering what I want to be “when I grow up.” Okay, this is very vague. I have mixed feelings on finding the “perfect” career. I think this is pretty typical for my generation. I recognize and accept that every job is challenging. I believe you should work to live, not live to work. But I still feel I am entitled to having a rewarding career, whatever that looks like. I’m a social worker by trade. I have a graduate degree and I am very close to becoming licensed. I have struggled with this professional identity crisis for the past four years. I simply want to find a job that I enjoy, that gives me satisfaction and purpose. If it is in the field of social work, so be it. If not, I hope I figure it out!
3. Having a family. This is pretty simple. I picture myself having children. I guess I could live without a family that includes my own children. A few years ago, I would have laughed if you told me this would be on my list. I would have thought you were crazy actually. This has become incredibly important to me, though.
4. Settling down and buying a home. When I thought of settling down in the past, it always took place in a far away city (like Portland or DC). Now I have no idea where I want to settle down. I’ve grown fond of this sprawling southern city, but I know my husband isn’t happy here. I want a place that I can call home.

So that’s it. That’s my list. It’s very simple and extremely vague. I don’t have lofty dreams of starting my own business, writing a book, or becoming President. I just want a life that feels complete to me, and that means a great marriage, fulfilling career, my own little tots, and buying a home.